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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网* @( _! d7 h" e: B4 ?. j* Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ/ m5 n) r! I" h# @% v6 c% O0 gfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;" V% l" R/ _8 o# l+ n
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。. x2 ~8 N( p9 d6 amso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第 M6 y8 V1 {% v5 C7 L0 j) H Z! Q5 }mso-font-kerning:0pt">5' g0 a+ O2 W. Q7 V5 P
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: ?2 N7 e8 K( I: ]) J5 Smso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：3 k3 I* c' ]! A3 M. O* Emso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 J; R: f- ?5 R' |mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;. ^) M1 D+ H+ X; _; ]6 Y4 [9 Y
mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。) P/ d- B* V/ y. \, Amso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 K# J- w7 R/ Y/ {8 o/ u( nmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
1 G) P7 P5 W; _0 }/ G# {8 hmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：, C3 e' f6 l+ k( T$ d, ?
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' S" J/ o7 q6 U& V' W& Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。7 k' K* R: B3 n9 S6 @; n: M$ K
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：) l' Y" x( n( ]( w( U1 ]8 H" w/ k
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- c6 ^4 A* C. Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？3 L/ C; v) r {! v3 O
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8 E1 Q6 d! ^; v8 j. R) Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：1 ^( k9 C- m- F' [
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: Q# Y8 _. {% [mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。5 x- u; O2 L$ T* t4 `7 W* o& Y+ f
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6 \5 Q1 M* h7 E$ k. r' dmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。$ F1 s2 Z T3 T# Z" Y% Q6 v- emso-font-kerning:0pt">
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, }* t, \2 {% mmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：" }& {" H1 P( H+ r' R0 U# ~( q5 E1 G% w
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0 j) y4 K, h! T- Imso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。# l$ K K& X6 l, z0 J. O
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9 H; M2 m6 k, \; k0 N Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：7 ?# f$ J3 \$ Z6 _( k) ]6 }
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! W1 W9 F R- |3 |8 uTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。" V2 l& ~, F: x0 _ {0 Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">"& {/ _0 j; w3 g+ d' _6 h8 kfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
& q- r x! p1 a$ P# S- L _- e5 hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：3 z' w/ U; {! W( R/ K& v
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7 t" ]6 {) ] |$ Kmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢- j; J3 `: q5 `8 l0 \; x6 {; F
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：. C$ P x+ @1 I4 w
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; f* w2 w( G" D: h! zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。$ P3 J- ^+ F+ s% J4 W+ K& J2 Dmso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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3 W" b! ~- ^1 b) }8 }4 Xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是! r! `. ~' M1 k/ c6 M% w4 p
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) B" Y' }) e- \* m' T& f. cmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违. X0 d* Y+ S9 G$ S& ]: x; ?0 l10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”0 K, z, q& \6 Ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;4 n$ C) J7 \2 r- T
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5 t2 v& f6 R( P1 U* @$ g7 R( Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得$ {+ H" t* H E2 c% h E: p5 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">“8 @/ W3 l r( |4 Q$ Zfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;& k9 S' `* G( }( y ^$ a
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违% s* P+ B8 n/ Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">”/ {5 f9 m2 J+ o' f0 i s( @font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
/ X. b }/ b0 ]8 m9 Rmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲- \9 E0 _. [% s1 V0 o5 J: T. W: amso-font-kerning:0pt">“; d% q5 c* u6 `6 {) e/ lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
5 i2 u9 I; o& \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违# ~$ P/ {( l9 W4 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">”" o( ^5 g' I: W& w& g0 N' n* E1 @font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma; W8 ?) W: O/ g7 F& K7 m6 h, [
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，0 W( }" L& c: q9 Z# x) Q+ M
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。" |' E- n0 B3 b7 o) o* h3 tmso-font-kerning:0pt">”" r' o4 t; Y A, _/ o" a: v4 ~/ Zfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
: t q+ }) ?) f- smso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。* D$ Q" f5 U5 [/ q1 hmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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F4 `) ?2 _5 \. N9 T, ^9 Zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？6 ^3 T; j' B- K1 n
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。 ~& m p0 G# |# X" k- f- gmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义# k( |5 j; G6 S( Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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' f/ s6 e5 s) t ^! N6 r. CTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！; g. P! Z2 Q- R! W; m- K" ~
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。3 u ~; d0 C' a& b3 |8 ?: B
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述: k- x/ L/ {. R) C
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊( S: E# l1 P9 X7 C2 q: |
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。' z' M5 ?" p5 v% t0 ? @" {
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孝经
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3 v% N' [% k* |. lTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。! N& F! i9 ~4 V2 x+ gmso-font-kerning:0pt">——& O) C: b( d( H9 Z) cfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;3 M3 w% n4 e3 C' \: B
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。* ]! u M" T0 m0 E- `& umso-font-kerning:0pt">——, ~. {; i/ |" P7 j0 xfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;/ D* L$ C& @- R! a8 r" |
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：( U" s+ f! S2 H8 M4 [$ D+ zmso-font-kerning:0pt">“. m& L$ j. n& Ifont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;! w: B1 i( t$ h4 \+ v
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。8 @0 ^7 ^2 l0 L9 n' b
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个/ x# d" n6 z$ b6 `
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. E1 [6 N/ t9 v3 c! k+ emso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬. W- k, g% D$ n0 w! C/ A ymso-font-kerning:0pt">”) L* n6 s4 T2 q3 a
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为3 c. @4 Q: K; j5 d
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0 p- M- G; Z! H& a1 d! Nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。2 Z+ M6 u6 E& n% m
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8 d5 t3 S' E" b; }Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的* q: u0 {/ ~* H# u
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# e0 R# F. V1 o8 K6 Q, nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思& J* W( z3 m& B( k6 h
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